The Fool Explores the Unknown

THE MYTH

Combustible Flatulence

THE REALITY

In testing this I was amazed (and utterly shocked!!) to find farts do burn. As do bed sheets, dressers and other various bedroom furnishings. In fact the only thing that saved the house was that I was drinking beer and REALLY had to go!

This is an interesting method of removing unwanted body hair, and a large portion of wanted body hair. During this episode I invented a couple of new dances and several new swear words, including "badfitch", which apparently means "Holy crap, my bum is on fire!"

I realize having a blow torch with a bright blue flame, coming out of your behind sounds cool and exotic, but oddly it was a tad uncomfortable. The doctor says I should be able to sit down in 4-6 weeks and there shouldn't be any long term effects on other sensitive organs in that area. (They weren't being overly used anyway.)

In the future if in some drunken stupor this seems to sound like something you want to try, remember, "Preparation H" will be your new best friend.